16 red flags
for churches that have gone astray
When there’s no clear pathway to bring up concerns. if you do, you’re labeled immature or divisive.
When you can’t easily find out who the leaders are (especially elders or executive teams)
When churches force employees to sign NDAs in order to retain severance.
When churches surveil their staff and monitor their social media.
When pastors lash out at perceived critics from the pulpit.
When there are few wiser, older people in leadership.
When your pastor tells you how to vote (& if you vote differently, your salvation is questioned).
When messaging is tone deaf to the hurting, struggling, and broken people in the pews but favors the strong.
When a church does not disclose its spending practices or budget.
When people who leave (or are fired) are demonized and shunned.
When pastors are corrected publicly for theology or practice, they double down on their rightness.
When their language reflects “We are the only growing church. Everyone else is not as awesome as us.”
When an elder board or board of directors is disassembled or completely changed.
When a church values its own PR machine more than the voices of the ones it has silenced or undermined.
When leadership treats wealthy, giving members to special perks (trips, access to the pastor, recognition).
When pastors treat the pulpit like a stand up routine or a place to fill their insecure ego rather than teach the gospel.
Sometimes it’s easier to highlight red flags when we’re trying to discern if our church is safe. If you’ve been hurt through your local church, or you feel that something’s wrong, but you can’t articulate exactly what, perhaps this list of 16 toxic traits will help you.
It boils down to transparency, honesty, and kindness. Is your church transparent in their finances? Are they honest in the way they communicate? Are they kind to the people who can give them the least?
Or are they protective of the institution, preferring their reputation far more than the people who have been hurt? Or have they covered up abuse? Have they publicly taken down those who have raised concerns?
A local church, though not perfect, should be a haven for the broken, a place where the gospel means more than ego, and a group of Christ followers who look out for one another. There should be a conviviality of members—a flattened hierarchy where each person exercises their gifts. Laity feel welcomed. Celebrities are nonexistent. Worship is meaningful—less spectacle, more honesty.
All churches have problems. But not all churches actively harm their members. Some do, sadly. This is a problem because those abusive churches don’t represent the heart of Jesus. He didn’t build an empire to himself. He didn’t topple Rome or seek its power. He reminded us that even he didn’t come to be served, but to serve.
I fear we have created some churches to be a monument to our glory, not the Lord’s. And when we worship the created rather than the Creator, all sorts of abuses and underhanded practices flourish.
I have to introspect when I read these red flags. I have to ask the Lord to please sift my heart. I don’t want to get to a place that I’m no longer confront-able. I don’t want to spend my time pursuing only the rich folks or the popular kids at the table. I want to take the lowest seat, find the people in the margins (as Jesus did with the woman at the well). I want to be teachable and flexible. I want to listen more than I preach.
I sense God doing a grand work these days. He is spotlighting these false structures of ego that masquerade as a church. He is bringing his holy light to underhanded practices, unchecked power, and bully leaders. We are seeing them clearly.
Many will say to Jesus, “Did we not build edifices to you? Did we not preach to crowds?” And he may say, “Depart from me, I never knew you.”
Again I say, Lord have mercy.
All of these. I hope this helps the people who are hurting and unsure to have the courage to walk away from abusive leaders.
My new phrase is grey hair over flair! Get outta my face with slick slimy sermons, because if a leader lacks character, when they fall, it creates ripple effects that go on for a long time. Show me someone that has faithfully walked with the Lord for 30 years in a row, and I may be inclined to listen to them.